cutting my addictions. i've decided to take a break from the social networking site i met this guy from. take a break for a few days at least. taking a break from it will help me hate him less i think. give me some distance. life goes on. he has my cell no if he really wants to hang out again. otherwise, oh well. i could tell myself that i'll meet others but the truth is, i may not. i may never meet the one for me. my life is very stressful right now. i have too few friends. too few money. i have no love. my job is stressful. i need another part time job. i might need a roommate. i think i need to go see an intuitive counselor again but i'm scared but it's hard! it's really really emotional to go see one. i don't feel like crying anymore. it's really hard to "let go" when the person you like, who you are trying to forget about, is always online, on the internet. a presence in front of you. i wanna tell everyone around me to go fuck themselves right now. i wanna tell this guy to go fuck himself, i wanna tell another guy i like to go fuck himself. i'm worth more than this shit. a guy should call me on the fucking phone and making fucking dates with me on the fucking phone. one of the guys is a southerner and he's always talking about how ppl up here don't know how to date. he doesn't fucking know how to date. i just don't wanna date right now. everyone fucking sucks. i don't feel loved at all. i'm a good person. i'm worthy of love. why don't i have love. i have a good singing voice, i'm a good dancer, i'm a kind person, i (used to be a) am a good writer, i'm smart, i can be funny, i'm decent looking. then why do i want to die? i wish i had never started talking to this guy on this social networking website. i wish i had never met him. i wish he had never showed an interest in me. i wish my job was different.